Why is it so difficult to cut back on my drinking
Remember your first few experiences of trying alcohol? Would you feel a bit woozy after only one or two sickly sweet drinks? Fast forward and your drink of choice has probably changed and you can drink way more than you used to. Over time our tolerance for alcohol increases which is one of…
My love / hate relationship with drinking
Do you have a love / hate relationship with drinking? But there’s also a side you hate. My love / hate relationship with drinking went on for years. I didn’t want to stop drinking as I thought that was a drastic measure and I certainly wasn’t at the stage where I needed to…
My three-step approach to taking back control of my drinking
I know how tricky it can be to take back control of your drinking because it was something I was struggling with a few years ago. 🤔 I knew it was affecting me in all sorts of ways (poor sleep, making my menopause symptoms worse, weight gain, dark circles under my eyes, feeling blah!). 🤔…
When life gets difficult how do you cope without drinking?
I’ve had a tough few months. 😟 My partner underwent major surgery. 😟 Work was stressful. 😟 The normal juggle of life became particularly overwhelming. If this had happened a few years ago I would have used it as an excuse to drink more to take the edge off and ‘cope’. But, that wasn’t an…
Six book recommendations for when you’re rethinking your drinking
(This post was originally published in December 2021 and updated in July 2023) Until I decided to take a break from drinking I didn’t realise there was a whole genre of books referred to as ‘quit lit’ (quitting drinking literature). They include memoirs, how-to guides and self-help books. I’ve listed my top six but there…
Want to make alcohol small and irrelevant in your life?
I was recently interviewed on the Dear Menopause podcast where I talked about how I changed my unhealthy drinking habit. We chatted about how I had got to the stage where I didn’t like the direction my drinking was headed, and started looking into why alcohol had such a hold on me. This led me…
Are you sick and tired of feeling sick and tired?
Recently I was sick – not with COVID thankfully – but my symptoms did include headaches, fatigue and low energy levels. They were similar to the after effects of a night of drinking. When we are sick with a cold virus or other illness, we take care of ourselves by resting, hydrating and eating well. Yet…
Are you a keen exerciser but also enjoy a drink? You’re not alone
I saw the following post on my Facebook Memories the other day and it reminded me how I used to justify my drinking, even when I was trying to stay fit. “Just finished Kokoda Grunt – a 13km run (7km uphill) with 26 challenges. The whole thing took more than four hours. Worse thing was…
Want to change the way you drink but afraid of what that means?
Often new coaching clients reach out to me because they know they need to change the way they drink, they just don’t know how to do it. They’re not quite sure what alcohol coaching actually does but they think it might help them. (Spoiler alert: It does help them!). Change can be scary. Not knowing…
Questioning your drinking but don’t know how to fix it?
In my recent interview with Sonya Lovell on the Dear Menopause podcast I talked about the years I spent questioning my relationship with alcohol but not knowing how to fix it. I was a grey-area drinker – someone who is worried about the impact of their drinking but hasn’t hit a rock bottom or think…
How to take a break from drinking without feeling deprived
If you’ve ever taken a break from drinking – Dry July or Feb Fast for example – you may have experienced some of the following: 😖 Feeling like you were white knuckling it through to the end of the month (or whatever time period you’ve set yourself) 🥱 Boredom ❓ Battling the “will I /…
Why I didn’t need to hit rock bottom to change my drinking
My decision to take a break from drinking wasn’t because my life was falling apart around me. The way I was drinking hadn’t led to losing a job, alienating loved ones or racking up drink-driving offences. So when I told people that I was taking time away for alcohol they often looked puzzled and asked…
Want to change your drinking but don’t know how?
When I was worrying about my drinking and trying to cut back it was a really uncomfortable place to be. While lots of people around me were drinking in the same way, I just knew that it wasn’t doing me any favours. I was worried about my health. I was concerned that I was starting…
The crazy rules I thought would help me cut back my drinking
When I was trying to moderate my drinking I had all these rules I tried to follow. It was exhausting and a little bit soul destroying. Why was this so hard? I could achieve what I wanted in other areas of my life so why was this so hard. I had a busy job, a…
Advice I wish I’d given myself when I was struggling with drinking
In my recent interview with Annie Grace on the This Naked Mind podcast we talked about how I spent years trying to moderate my drinking until finally, after using her approach, I decided to take a break. I learned more about how alcohol worked in my brain and body (spoiler alert – it’s addictive!) and…
But wine is my one vice!
I’m a fairly healthy person. I exercise regularly, I avoid junk food as much as possible (although hot chips are my downfall) and I do all the regular health checks. Let me just adjust my halo! Actually, let me take that halo off because I’m certainly no angel. That was definitely the case with drinking.…
“My drinking has crept up on me.”
For years – decades – I thought of myself as a ‘normal drinker’. The way I drank didn’t really worry me. Sure, every now and then I would overdo it and regret drinking too much. But it always seemed under control … until it wasn’t. I felt that my drinking had crept up on me.…
Worried about what drinking is doing to your health?
For years we’ve been told that drinking in moderation is good for our health but a new report shows that it is NOT true. The comprehensive scientific report analysing more than 100 studies showed that drinking (even in moderation) doesn’t have health benefits … in fact having even two drinks a day significantly increases your…
You may be surprised at the type of person who seeks help for their drinking
I used to think there were two types of drinkers – normal drinkers and alcoholics. For a long time I considered myself a normal drinker. Even when my drinking increased, I didn’t consider it an issue. Sure, I was drinking more than the government guidelines (10 standard drinks a week) but weren’t most people drinking…
I blamed myself because I couldn’t moderate my drinking
Like Gwyneth Paltrow I’m a big believer in ‘conscious uncoupling’. Unlike Gwyneth though, my conscious uncoupling hasn’t been from my partner (although there are days when I’m tempted!). Mine has been from alcohol – white wine in particular. “What does that even mean?” you may ask. When I was struggling to cut back on my…
Finding that there’s always a reason that you ‘need’ to drink?
When I was trying to moderate my drinking, my aim was to only drink on the weekend. However, it often seemed that any day ending in ‘y’ was a good enough reason to pour a glass … and often the next, and the next. Canadian comedian Julie Nolke’s ‘Impossible New Year’s Resolution’ sketch on YouTube,…
“Surely my drinking isn’t bad enough to give up?”
Worried about how much you’re drinking but quitting alcohol seems too extreme? You may have tried to moderate but cutting back is not as easy as you thought it would be. Sound familiar? This was my experience and it was so frustrating! I talked about this in my interview with Maz Compton on her podcast…
Using alcohol to switch off? There’s a good reason why
Do you feel like your life is one big to-do list that you never get to the end of? If your to-do list is anything like mine, every time I tick something off, another thing takes its place. And trying to keep track of it all leads to a whirring mind that’s constantly figuring out…
Wondering if alcohol is taking more than it is giving?
If you’re worried about your drinking – which I’m guessing you are if you’re reading this – then you’re probably trying to cut back or quit altogether. I can’t remember exactly when I started to question my drinking, it was more like a growing realisation that my regular white wine habit wasn’t doing me any…
“I need to change the way I’m drinking. Where do I start?”
“Help! I’m drinking too much. I need to do something about it but don’t know where to start.” I hear this regularly from people who are frustrated because they can’t seem to change the way that they drink. They know they need to do something but what? It just feels so overwhelming. If you are struggling to know where to start,…
‘Dear Wine: I’m breaking up with you. This is why.’
Dear wine, I’m breaking up with you. I’d like to tell you that it’s not you, it’s me, but that simply is not true. It is you. You promised me a lot and for a long time I believed those things to be true. Then it started dawning on me that having you in my…
Finding it hard to moderate? This is why
If you’re worried that you’re drinking too much, you’ve probably tried to cut back. Like so many of us who have tried to moderate our drinking, you may have been shocked that it was not as simple as you first thought. You may even have questioned if there was something wrong with you. “Why is…
What I gave up when I quit drinking … and it’s not what you think
For years I tried to cut back on how much I was drinking. I knew I was drinking more than I should – the government guidelines seemed ridiculously low – but it wasn’t as if I thought of myself as a ‘problem drinker’. I was stuck in this limbo world – I wanted to cut…
Continue drinking the way you are – the surprising advice I give to clients
You may think that as an alcohol coach the first thing I ask clients to do is throw out every alcoholic product in their home and stop drinking. Not so! My advice is one that often takes new clients by surprise. “Continue drinking the way you currently are,” I tell them. If you’re thinking that…
Why am I finding it so difficult to cut back?
Many of the women who reach out to me for help with their drinking ask why they are finding it so difficult to cut back or quit. By the time they contact me they have tried to moderate, or stop altogether, and have been shocked at how difficult it has been. “Sure, I’m drinking more…
How do you deal with a stressful day without drinking?
As someone who used to drink to unwind from the stresses of life, I was worried about how I would deal with crappy days without turning to wine. I could really relate to the meme: “Drink responsibly? Shit, responsibility is why I drink”. Yes I knew that drinking too much wasn’t good for me. But…
Looking for extra support to cut back on your drinking?
January used to be the month that I promised myself that I would rein in my drinking. Actually, I made that promise to myself every month but my intention was stronger in January! I’d be recovering from the excesses of the festive season – too much wine, champagne and Christmas cake. I’d be feeling sluggish and flat, promising myself that…
This question may just help change the way you drink
Do you wake up in the morning promising that you will drink less, or not at all, only to find yourself pouring a drink that very afternoon? If you’re using alcohol as a way to deal with life’s challenges, then reaching for a drink can sometimes feel like an automatic response. Does any of the…
End-of-year recommendations: Top stories + the best AF sparkling wine
As we close the door on 2022 and roll out the welcome mat for 2023, I thought it was timely to do an end of year best-of edition. Top blog posts of the year The three most read blog posts on my website this year were: What is alcohol coaching and how can it help…
Recommendation: six of my favourite alcohol-free sparkling wines
If you like a glass of celebratory bubbles but you’re not drinking alcohol or cutting back, here are six of my favourite alcohol-free wines. I’ve listed them in alphabetical order as it was difficult to choose a favourite! Live Light has a Sparkling Rose and Sparkling White both of which I’ve enjoyed and have recently…
Don’t want another year of trying (and failing) to control the way you drink?
My ‘New Year, New You’ Special Offer Would you like a gift for yourself that will last longer than a fancy candle or a box of chocolates? The best present you can give yourself is to take back control of your drinking so, to help you do that, I’m giving away a few gifts as…
Already overdoing it this festive season … and it’s not even Christmas Day yet?!
How are you going this festive season? Are you full of goodwill, peace and joy? Or, are you stressed about: If you’re feeling more stressed than blessed, welcome to the club! I used to drink to manage stress and at this time of year my drinking definitely spiked (especially with more social events on the…
Recommendation: Six of my favourite alcohol-free drinks
If you’re taking a break from alcohol – either short term or as a longer-term lifestyle choice – you may want to find a new favourite drink from the growing range of alcohol-free options. Taste is very individual so there may be some trial and error to find the drinks you enjoy. For me, that…
How can I cut back (or quit) and still have a social life?
Drinking and socialising go hand in hand so when people decide to cut back on their drinking or to stop altogether, they are often worried that it will impact on their social life. I get it – it was one of my biggest fears. When I first decided to take a break from alcohol, the…
Why am I struggling to cut back on my drinking?
Ask the coach “I know that I need to cut back on my drinking but it’s not so simple.” “While I’m aware of the impacts of drinking more than I should, I still do it.” “Why is it so hard to cut back?” Answer As an alcohol coach, this is one of the most commonly…
The surprising advice on how to gain back control of your drinking
The best way to gain back control of your drinking is to stop trying to quit drinking. What? You may be thinking that my advice doesn’t make sense – but hear me out. The most effective way to take back control your of drinking is to change your mindset around alcohol not to constantly try…
Why do so many smart, capable women drink more than they want to?
Are you a perfectionist who drinks too much? If so, there may be a link. A recent study has shown a link between perfectionists and an increased susceptibility to drinking too much. It struck a chord with me because, as an alcohol coach, many of the women I work with fit this pattern. They are…
“What do I do if I’m not drinking and how are people going to judge me?”
This week I’m sharing part of the conversation I had with Maz Compton on her podcast Last Drinks, which was released this week. We talked about my decision to take a three-month break from alcohol (which ended up being a complete break-up with booze) and my biggest fears around doing that. Maz: You tried to…
“I was stuck in the moderation trap – trying to moderate and not being able to.”
In my interview with burnout and balance coach Wendy McCallum on her podcast Bite-Sized Balance, we discussed a whole range of topics including moderation: “I was stuck in that moderation trap – trying to moderate and not being able to. And it was making my drinking increase.” I also chatted about the love/hate relationship I…
“I thought it was just me.” Spoiler alert: It’s not just you!
One of the most common things that coaching clients tell me is how frustrated they are at not being able to control their drinking. “I have no willpower.” “Why can’t I be more disciplined?” “No-one else around me seems to have an issue with this. Why me?” This thinking is so familiar to me not…
Alcohol-Free Drinks Review – Tempus Two Zero Alcohol Wine
The growth in the alcohol-free drinks market is a real boon for people who want to cut back on how much they drink and those who choose not to drink. * Finding good, alcohol-free options has been one of the many tools that has helped me embrace and love a life without booze. This week…
What is alcohol coaching and how can it help with drinking?
I recently published a story in Mamamia – “I’m an alcohol coach: these are the three signs that you may want to rethink the way you drink” – that raised a few questions, including: I’ve answered the most common questions I receive about alcohol coaching below. If you’re interested in coaching and want to know…
Ask me anything: How do I unwind without a drink?
Question: “I’m finding it hard to cut back on how much I drink. I’m in the routine of having a glass of wine to wind down from the stresses of the day.” “The problem is that once I have the first glass, I pour another, then another. And then I wake up the next day…
Mamamia story – Three signs that you may want to rethink your drinking
This week (3 October 2022), Mamamia published a story I had written: “I’m an alcohol coach – these are the three signs that you may want to rethink your drinking”. You can read the full story on the Mamamia website. If you are worried about your drinking there are a few things you can do.…
Most common fears about taking a break from drinking – and the reality
When I was considering taking a break from drinking a little voice in my head (you know the one – negative, whining, annoying) gave me all the reasons why that would be a bad idea. They went something like this … How will you unwind? Life is busy and stressful, and your mind is constantly…